Do You Make These 7 Mistakes with Women?
I've been thinking. (I know...not only is it AMAZING! you're saying Oh no, not again!) I've put together a list based on personal experience and what I hear constantly from many sources. For some reason, people like to talk and share with me. So here are a few things that men might want to consider if they are back on the dating market, OR even in a relationship.
There are 7 big mistakes (in my opinion) that most guys make when they just start out going out with someone new. Look this list over, and then ask yourself if you've ever been guilty of any of these.
The good news is that just by knowing these 7 items, you're protecting yourself from making these mistakes again. (I know ladies...I shouldn't be giving up any of our secrets!)...But, here we go anyway.
1. Volunteering negative information about yourself.
Why is it that men sometimes think that by listing out all your flaws, mistakes, faults and bad habits that women will suddenly drop to their knees and thank God that she met you?
Seriously... keep a lid on the negative stuff about yourself. You don't need to "make sure" that she can live with your faults.
Put your best foot forward... always. Don't talk her "out of you" before she's even had a chance to know you or form her own opinions.
2. Being too concerned with what she thinks of you.
Okay, we all want to be liked, but obsessing about whether or not she likes you is the wrong way to go about it. Try this instead, and you'll find that you'll get much better results with women.
ASSUME that she likes you a LOT. Yep, that's right... just assume it. You've got to really know that you're a good catch, and you've got something to offer. Confidence is VERY sexy...but remember arrogance is not. There IS a huge difference. Look up the definitions if you need to.
3. Being too "nice".
Okay, where the heck did all you guys get the idea that you have to be super polite in order for us to like you? I've found that quite the opposite is true.
That doesn't mean that you should be a jerk, but look... every other guy is falling over themselves to kiss our bodacious booties. You've got to be different in order to get us to really pay attention to you.
Instead of being a jerk, be willing to bust our chops and make jokes with us. Try it, and you'll see. We appreciate a little humor and sarcasm along the way. That doesn't mean you can't be a gentleman...just don't overdo it trying to be "Prince Charming"...everyone has some warts and they will have to come out eventually.
4. Needing her to like you or approve of you.
Look, we're not going to agree with everything you say, and if the woman in question has a mind of her own... she probably won't like everything you do. So what.
Be willing to be yourself and STICK to that, even if she challenges you. No... ESPECIALLY if she challenges you.
5. Talking too much about yourself.
Have you ever been on a date, and felt like you HAD to keep the conversation going with her, or else she'd get bored and lose interest? I think we all have... me included!
Believe it or not, silence is okay. In fact, it's a good thing to shut up once in a while... and just BE there with her.
Be a listener, not a talker. There's a reason that God gave you 2 ears and only 1 mouth. Remember this mantra: Listening gets me laid... listening gets me laid... listening gets..... okay I'm being silly. Seriously...Try it. *wink* You also might learn something or see a warning sign that you otherwise might miss in your haste to just rate her tits and backside and not hear what she's really all about.
6. Not being truthful about your desires.
Look, there are PLENTY of women who are more than happy to just have a casual sex relationship with you. (Trust me, it's true) But don't bullshit women by telling them that you're really interested in settling down into a long term relationship if you're really not.
Really... it's bad news, and will not help you get laid at ALL. Be honest about what you're after, but learn how to communicate it in a way that is attractive to her. It will save you a lot of grief in the long run, and women deserve to know going in what you really want. It might just be they want you for their boy toy to play with and nothing more as well. Make sure you're on the same page and don't say something she wants to hear, JUST to "try her out", so you can say you had her...and then plan on moving on to the next willing participant.
7. Being too agreeable.
Nobody wants to date someone who's JUST like them. If you ARE dating someone who's just like you, then one of you is not necessary in the relationship. :)
Be willing to disagree with her, and even make fun of her for thinking the way she does (but in a playful way). Celebrate your differences, don't hide them.
Be willing to challenge her, also to let her challenge you. We grow by relating to people who are different than us, and trying on their thoughts and ideas to see if it works better than your current one. Personally I love a good challenge. A man with a good head on his shoulders in addition to the head in the lower regions. Someone that will keep me engaged and on my toes, keep my attention...match my imagination.
Don't be a "YES man". Hold true to what you think, and you'll be a lot closer to getting her naked than you'll be if you agree with everything she says.
There is a middle ground between being a jerky bad boy and a goodie two shoes whimp. While it's true, some women look for that really BAD boy (which I think is stupid, you get what you ask for...so don't bitch about it afterwards when he treats you BADLY and neglects or leaves you)....and some women look for a man they can run all over and be the boss of (how boring that would be...whimps get VERY boring, very quickly)...most of us want someone that is honest with us, regardless of the outcome. Be yourself...you'd have to eventually anyway..might as well start out that way and KNOW someone wants you for YOU.
Now...ladies, either add to the list or offer opinions...encountered any of these or are they some of your pet peeves?
and Men...tell me what you think, either from experience or from the male perspective. Do any of these help? Well, you know they'd help with ME anyway! *wink*
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